Kingdom
by Davine Chick
Summary: Sam and Dean are checking out a club for a lead on a missing girl. One-shot. Dean's manhood is questioned.


When he and Sam had first arrived at Kingdom they had split up. Sam went to talk to some of the girls that worked there, maybe one of them could give them a clue as to where they could find the girl they were looking for. Her name was Lena and she had been a waitress at Kingdom for a couple months. A week after she had been seen with this sketchy looking guy she disappeared. Sam hoped that this Natalie girl, supposedly her best friend, would have an idea of what had happened. At first they had thought this would be an open shut case, ya'know something normal like she fell in love and ran away. But of course not, when did they ever get normal.

Dean headed toward the bar; to him beer was essential in this environment, whether it was for pleasure or work. The bartender was a tall leggy brunette with a red mini dress and a name tag that read Veronica. He waved his hand slightly so she knew he was there. The gesture caught her eye and she lifted one finger to let him know it would be a sec.

"Hiya, what can I get for ya?" Veronica had a silky voice that flowed over him despite the loud hip hop that had been blaring since the guys had walked in.

"Well Veronica, can I get a nice cold Budweiser and maybe your number?" He gave her that famous Dean smirk that worked almost all of the the time. Even if he couldn't find anything out about the girl, maybe he could find something out about this bartender while he was still in town.

She popped the top off the bottle and slid it over to him. "And no you can't have my number."

He raised an intrigued eyebrow at her, "And why not? Am I not your type?" Yes he was cocky and he knew it, but he had been on a streak lately and he wasn't gonna let her ruin it by dismissing him without a reason.

"Exactly." She kept up her conversation with him while she helped a few other patrons.

"Oh really and why is that?" Apparently she could be cocky too, but if he was lucky maybe he could change her mind. He just needed to know how.

She looked at him with a lifted eyebrow and her lips curved into a devilish grin. "You really wanna know?" He nodded his head and she leaned over the bar towards him. The front of her dress dropped a bit and he could see perfect breasts trying their hardest to spill out over her lacy black bra. The sight put a pleased grin on his face, she was falling for it and he'd be taking her home after her shift.

" Well its a small thing really..."

"Small... huh ok."

"Well see you... ummm..." She was teasing him, he could tell and frustration is not a good thing for Dean Winchester, especially sexual frustration.

"What is it, Im sure we could work something out, beautiful?"

"Well its this tiny little thing you got, that well my type doesn't." He thought she was hot an all, but this beating around the bush crap was getting irritating.

"Huh, and what would that be?" Still her voice was making it hard for him to be completely turned off by her.

"Well see hun, you have a penis and well that just doesn't work for me."

Dean almost fell off his stool. He was so shocked, for as long as he could remember that had never been a problem. Then it hit him, "What do you mean small, tiny, little? Where do you get off making accusations like that?"

"Hey Dean, you find anything?" Sam walked up behind him to hear him sputtering something to the bartender.

Dean turned to look at Sam then back at Veronica. He had an angry, confused and very frustrated look on his face. He gave Veronica a nasty look, "Why yes, yes in deed. Do you know what this crazy woman just told me?"

The first thought that came to Sam was that in the short amount of time that they had been her at Kingdom, Dean had drank way too much. The second was that the bartender had cut him off. "Did she cut off, have you had too much again?" Turning to look at the bartender he saw that her name tag said Veronica.

"Im sorry Veronica if my brother here has angered or offended you. Sometimes he drinks a little too much."

Dean looked at Sam with an offended glare. "No I did not drink too much, this is my first damn beer. Its this woman, Veronica, she's crazy."

As Dean attempted to clear his name of the drinking, Veronica just stood behind the bar with an amused smile.

"Ok Dean, if you're not drunk then tell me why this very nice bartender is crazy."

"Nice? She is most certainly not nice at all." Sam just looked at Dean with mock understanding and nodded to try to prove that he believed him, which he did not but it was funny watching him try to explain it. " She is not nice, and you want to know why? I'll tell you why, she is insulting my man hood."

"Oh she is, well that's horrible." Sam said with the most sarcasm in the world. He looked at Veronica with a smile that was most definitely holding back a good laugh. "Did you insult my brothers man hood?"

Veronica cleared her features of the obvious laughter she was holding in, and with as much control as possible said, "No I did not insult him. I just told him that because he has a penis he is not my type."

Dean choked on the sip of beer he had just taken and stared at her in disbelief. "No you said that I had a small dick!"

Sam was trying so hard at this point not to laugh, but the way Dean was reacting was making it very difficult.

"Im sorry but your brother I assume was insulted by the fact that my "type" don't have penises."

Sam had already caught on and figured he'd rub it in a little more. He wanted to see if Dean could become anymore embarrassed by the fact that he had just bee turned down. "So Dean, are you trying to tell me that she insulted your manhood by trying to explain that she's a lesbian? I thought you liked them?"

"I do, but... Hey that's not the point. She said I have a small dick. What the hell, your just going to let this go? What kind of brother are you?"

Sam couldn't hold in the laughter anymore. He was laughing so hard that even Veronica and a few other patrons that had overheard the conversation joined in. "Come on Dean, let's go."

Sam pulled Dean from the bar stool and began dragging him towards the door.

Deciding that he needed the last word, he yelled over the crowd back towards the bartender. "I'll have you know I have a very big dick, Lady."

"Oh really, how about you whip it out and show us what you can do with it big boy." The low husky voice came from a very large burly man sitting at the bar.

Sam leaned into Dean's ear and holding back more laughter, "Dude, this is a gay club."

Even though there was hardly any color left in his face from seeing the large man stand up, he got even paler. Hell, Sam thought he had pissed himself.

"But, If you feel like winning back your manhood I can go wait for you at the motel."


End file.
